Parallels between Azazel and Cain


Sigil of Azazel

Though I have never previously worked with him, Azazel has been on my mind lately. I’ve even begun to invite him into my practice a little here and there so I have been going back through the textual sources of him to try and gain a better understanding. He is broad and varied, and could take up multiple posts to really analyze, but one thing that stuck out to me is a parallel I see between Azazel in the Day of Atonement ritual of Judaism, outlined in Leviticus 16, and Cain’s tale in Genesis 4.

To quickly paraphrase Leviticus, there are two goats brought forth. Lots are cast so that one goat is for “god” (YHWH/Jehova) and the other is for Azazel. The goat for YHWH is killed as a sacrifice, whereas the goat for Azazel survives. The priest places all the blame of the communities’ sins onto it, making it a literal scapegoat, then it is lead into the wilderness and released.

Azazel – Dictionnaire Infernal (Paris,1825).

This calls to mind Cain, who was marked and cast off to wander the wilderness east of Eden. In this tale, Abel is beloved of the Hebrew god, he is the favored son as it were, and he is slain by his brother. When this transgression is discovered, YHWH does not kill Cain, but rather marks him so that none shall kill him, and then sends Cain away bearing his sin. It is almost as if Abel is filling the shoes of the goat for YHWH and Cain is filling the shoes (hooves?) of the goat for Azazel.

Cain and Abel – Tintoretto

I don’t see any direct connections between these two characters though. Cain and Abel are hardly the first tale of feuding brothers, and purely a mythical story, whereas the Day of Atonement is still a literal holiday in modern Judaism. From a Left Hand Path perspective, the archetypes of Cain and Azazel embody similar traits however.

In Islamic mythology Azazel (Iblis) is a djinn. He is first born of smokeless fire, and is the one called Shaytan/Shaitan/Satan; the one who refused gods command to bow to Adam. Whether he is a scapegoat or djinn, Azazel seems to have no problem standing his ground in contrast with god. And it’s this trait which I also see echoed in Cain’s tale. When confronted by god regarding Abel’s disappearance he spits back “Am I my brother’s keeper?”

Both Azazel and Cain seem to represent strength, independence, and opposition to the ways of the Judeo “god” and so I’m finding both to be potent archetypes of the very essence of Satanism.

Changing Direction


Ever since starting this blog, I have only ever written a handful of posts. Every time I post again I say to myself that I want to post more regularly, at least once or twice a week or so, but then I sit here with nothing to say. I have decided recently that I think this is because the direction of this blog is no longer as inspiring to me as it was when it first began.

The original goal was to break down the concepts and philosophies that I used in my practice and bring them into the everyday. Since around the time of starting this blog though, my practice has become more and more serious and many times I find that I can’t in all honesty break certain concepts down to any more “mundane” terms, so it often leaves me with a mind full of racing thoughts, and a perfectly blank page in front of me, but nothing whatsoever to actually say.

To cure this tongue tied writers block I think the best course of action would be to change the direction of this blog a bit. I want to begin utilizing this space to discuss my practice, to brainstorm with others, and to discuss the philosophy and beliefs that influence me. I thought originally that I should start a new blog, something completely fresh and just drop this one off of my radar, but I think I’d rather keep it up. Perhaps the old posts might serve a purpose and if nothing else they illustrate the changes in my understanding and perception over time.

So this is fair warning to any who do read this blog, things will be moving in a more “occult” direction. If that’s not your cup of tea feel free to unfollow, I know it doesn’t suit everyone’s taste and that’s quite alright. I can’t rationalize keeping a blog I don’t write it, or mentally spinning my wheels in silence while I have a perfectly good outlet available, so in an attempt to be honest with myself this appears to be a step in the right direction.


fitzgerald write

Diabolus in Music(k)a

Symbolism utilized by the Polish band Behemoth
Symbolism utilized by the Polish band Behemoth

I originally wrote this for a forum I am a member of, but have reworked it for posting here as well. The original term “Diabolus in Musica”  meaning “the Devil in Music” refers to the Tritone, the augmented fourth of music theory and was dubbed as such by the Church during the middle ages.

When I was young, I was raised in a very strict Christian household. I had friends refer to my mother as the mom from the movie Carrie and they were only half joking. When my parents finally divorced my mother dove head first into the church and overnight anything that was not “church approved” was not allowed in our home. Books, movies, music, anything you can think of, if it wasn’t “Christian” or if it contradicted anything her current pastor was preaching, it would be broken, burned, or tossed out. I was thirteen when this change occurred in my home, and I don’t know if you’ve ever tried telling a thirteen year old girl what to think but needless to say, it was not a smooth transition.

Regardless, I was a musician, music was and is my passion. I play flute primarily, but am proficient on every instrument other than the guitar (I just cannot make sense of that thing). So I used music as an outlet. Friends would burn me CD’s from bands like Slayer, Cradle of Filth, and Deicide, and we would label them with the names of pop bands. I believe CoF’s Midian was labeled as a Backsteet Boys album for example so that when my room was searched it wouldn’t get tossed. There was no privacy at home, everything we had was searched at least once a week and eventually once a day. My mother’s church believed very much in “spiritual warfare” and that objects and subjects could bring spirits or demons into a persons life. She suffered quite a bit  at the hands of my father, we all did, and so I think it was fear that drove how strict our home became.

It was a little before this age, in middle school that I started getting pulled toward the occult. I had a met a boy during a summer music program, and his mother who was the first Wiccan I had ever met gave him a copy of Raising Hell: A Concise History of the Black Arts – and Those Who Dared to Practice Them, to give me. She said I might enjoy it. And she was right. It was found and burned eventually. I was severely punished. Allowed nowhere but school and church. But despite all that I am still glad she thought to pass the book onto me. It is not the most in depth or accurate, clearly not written from a practitioner, and fairly cheesy at some points, but for a kid who knew nothing, it was a pretty good introduction so it seems worth the mention.

By the second half of high school, I was a half-assed practitioner of sorts. A few friends and I had a small working group, and kept a book of notes that we passed back and forth to track everything that seemed important. For my 18th birthday one of them got me a copy of CoF’s Nymphetamine. I had never had the lyric booklets before for any of these bands, and we did not have internet. I fell in love with the lyrical style. It weaved myth and reality in and out in a way I had not realized. I found myself reading them over and over, scouring them as if they were a mini grimoire, and in all honesty, they sort of were. I had always been a fan of literature and adored dissecting the symbolism in poetry so every time I read them another few dots fell into place. At the time though, I thought I was just being rather silly.

In college, the world of metal really opened up to me. I was dating a man who was a fan of Venom and the first wave black metal bands. The first time I went home with him, the album Welcome to Hell was hanging on the wall overhead.


This was the door to everything, but at the time I detested those bands. I felt that music was an Art and that taking occult philosophies and purposefully making them cheesy for the mainstream was one of the lowest and most disrespectful things an artist could do. I have since changed my mind on that obviously. I was majoring in musical performance at the time. Taking theory courses, private lessons, and learning to conduct as well as play. I met an acquaintance who was very eager to get me into some new music, from him I found Amon Amarth, Gorgoroth, and a few other bands who also had pieces to share. This was also the time that I was able to begin researching the occult “legitimately”. And I use that phrase very lightly, but we had a bookstore across from campus and I had internet at last, so it was a start.

A few years later I came across Behemoth who has since become a beloved inspiration to me. For years I assumed that any dots I connected via music were just an illusion, that there was “real” info out there, I just had to find it. In fact I still believed this when I first started this blog. It was only after studying some of these philosophies more in depth that I could start to see the legitimacy of the lyrical content. I remember my head snapping to the side and exclaiming “what the fuck did they just say?!” when I heard the Behemoth lyric “think of me not as one, think of me not as none, think of me not at all, for I am continual” for the first time. I had assumed most metal bands were just putting on a show until that point.
Recently this world has cracked wide open with my discovery of bands such as Dissection and Watain who I adore as well, as I quite literally have integrated bits of their work into mine. It was with these two bands that I discovered the cross over between aspects of the metal world and the occult, were in fact, not all in my head.

A picture of my more recent simple altar set up utilizing the open pentagram concept from ToBL. Clearly, I'm not an artist, but you get the point.
A picture of my more recent simple altar set up utilizing the open pentagram concept from ToBL. Clearly, I’m not an artist, but you get the point.

I write this because I owe each and every one of these bands (as well as many more who are not yet named and are not limited to the metal genre) my utmost respect. When I was in the dark world of Christians, they showed me the light of what would become my own individual path. I thought it was just an outlet, loud music to let out a bit of anger. I thought it was just a release, and it very much was a release, but I see now that it was so much more. Without the march of their blast beats I would not have the pieces I have today, and I would not have been able to escape the traps I had unknowingly walked into once I found the supposedly “real” occult material I had always been looking for. I didn’t need to search so passionately, their voices were calling the whole time. And I want to thank them with all my heart.

Enlightenment and the WHOLE Left Hand Path

I have seen a lot of vitriol and hatred between segments of what I would term The Left Hand Path lately. I have been away from here focusing on studies in this vein, but I really feel it necessary to state my two cents on this topic.

In my opinion, the occult, Satanism, and Luciferianism are all essentially the same thing and that fragmenting them endlessly in order to turn a profit is actually doing more harm than good to those seeking to further themselves.

I have come to find that if something is true, it will manifest itself. Truth does not require Magi to “call it forth” with illusion and half understood psycho-babble. It does not require churches, or Guru’s. A few seeds of truth should be able to flourish and grow to deeper understanding, in accordance with ones Will. The more seeds of truth you find, the faster and more fully things flourish. And this, of course, depends on who and what you surround yourself with.

THIS is why the Left Hand Path is inherently individualized. We are individual manifestations.
Because of this, no two people will always perceive the same SEEDS of truth, even if they still perceive a similar truth overall.

The occult has always searched for enlightenment.
All things condemned by the Judeo Christian systems that have scourged so much of earth, were those which sought truth.

The “church” placed nearly all of it under one banner.
And that banner was evil, sin, and Satan.

They took the gods and systems that had sought to enlighten people through the aeons, and spliced them together into a Frankenstein-esque “Devil”. They forced enlightenment into the darkness. They taught those who were still able to see these bits of truth even within such darkness, that they were damned, evil, and internally corrupt. They taught people to ignore truth, and to ignore their Will.

They taught that enlightenment was sin.

And despite this, there have been people who, throughout the ages, have said “if truth is sinful, then I will be sinful!”
They have stood up, and said “I will be like your Satan, because I seek the truth, because I seek enlightenment.”

THAT is rebellion!

The whole world told them that they were wrong, yet they risked social status, career, well being, and their LIVES for enlightenment.

What enlightenment would exist today without the adversaries in the history of the occult?

There would be no truth left, but that which Christendom approved.

Would it not have been better for these people to have walked away? Would it not have been in the best interest of their self-preservation to settle into the “mundane” world of their time as so many are perfectly happy to do?

And why did they not? Why did they stand in opposition to the dogma of their time?

To pursue truth.

It sure as Hell was not simply to oppose the “status quo” as is so often taught today.

Satanism for social equality

Good evening all,

social equality

I know we have all been bombarded with recent news stories surrounding certain satanic groups and their involvement in social politics and free speech. Some support it, some hate it, some think they have clever ways of proving a point, others are disgusted and think satanic groups are too ridiculous to even give attention to. That got me thinking that many people may have no idea where the LHP in general stands on certain issues.

I don’t know who said this, but it made me giggle

Most LHP organizations are very supportive of social equality, for race, gender, orientation, religion (obviously), or anything else. Often in pagan circles you will hear people talking of “coming out”. Now, I don’t mention this to be disrespectful the the hardships that most LGBT people face when coming out to family and friends. Obviously my rather controversial beliefs are a choice that I had the option to make, which makes my situation quite different. But, in one aspect we are the sameWe have a fear of being rejected, often a fear of abuse or being disowned, we too have a need to keep this part of ourselves “quiet” in the workplace. (Would my fundamentalist boss still consider me for that raise if she knew I was “satanic”)?


Many member’s of the LHP community have been physically, verbally, and mentally abused by family members who discovered their beliefs, kicked out and cut off while they were still a minor, or disowned as an adult (for never growing up into a “normal” church going person). I myself spent most of my teen years getting severely abused for my beliefs (whipped, punched, choked,), and forced into “church counseling” where I was repeatedly told that I was evil, and that I could only rationalize my beliefs because I was possessed (I wish I was kidding). I have been lucky enough to remove myself from that situation, but it took me into adulthood before I could do so.


I say all this to say, anyone that has heard that satanist are skinheads, or homophobic, or misogynistic has been ill informed.  (The Baphomet is made of both genders…) We are all quite aware of how terrible social “witch hunts” can be (I mean obviously..shudder). Now, do LHP “denominations” or temples exist with those beliefs? Unfortunately I have come across one or two, but they are very small and mocked by the larger LHP community as a whole for having such utterly backward beliefs.
(Kind of like how most Christians might view the Westboro Baptist Church lol)

Equality and understanding is the only thing that will keep horrors like this from occurring to any group of people.

Again, I don’t speak for any specific group, I can only speak from what I have seen first hand. The LHP as a whole believes in individuality above all else, never let anything or anyone stop you from being who you truly are.

The “black flame”


Thoth tarot , trump XVII – The Star. Aleister Crowley. (Symbol of a “guiding light”, harmony and balance).


Thanks for coming back =)

Anyone who has spoken with others who follow the LHP or who has done a bit of research has likely come across the phrase “the black flame”. This is really a very important concept (possibly the single most important concept), but it seems like it has become convoluted and has become the cause of many, many, misunderstandings. This is the 3rd post for this blog, so in the vein of completion, I’d like to give you a cursory understanding of this very core concept as we reach the close of what I will consider our introduction.


Seal of the Infernal Union – to many this symbolizes the concept of the black flame


The black flame is a symbolic term. It is essentially the LHP term for the “divine spark” that resides in us all. Over the centuries, many philosophers and religious figures have tried to define what differentiates humans from the rest of animal kingdom.

Remember that LHP practitioners believe that Satan/Lucifer/Set/Prometheus a symbol of knowledge (all knowledge), it is necessary to understanding this concept. I personally believe that having a deep and balanced understanding of both “good” and
bad” knowledge (for lack of a better term)  is what fuels that spark within us.

There is no truly universal definition of this, because much like when you are asked to define your soul, you realize, it can be a very personal definition. But to most LHP practitioners, the black flame is what separates humans from the animals, it’s what burns with in us as the chaotic, rebellious, even sometimes destructive spirit that is necessary to lead to innovation, advancement, and in many cases beauty. According to some, this spark is what initially lead man to more creative endeavors such as music and art.


There are also some very prominent Luciferian groups who believe that a balance between light and dark energies and similarly, male and female energies, is needed to really manifest this sense of self enlightenment. In some sects this concept is defined by a sexual union of two deities; Lilith (pre-christian goddess, mythological queen of hell), and Samael who has both been defined as a demon of war and passion, and, as a being synonymous with Satan himself. This pair is also viewed by many as a sort of opposite but parallel version of what Adam and Eve represent.


I agree with this sentiment, I think a balanced understanding off all the energies both around us and within us, is necessary to know thyself and fuel the spark within us. And so, to close this introduction with a bit of a personal note, here is a short poem I wrote as a way of trying to illustrate my personal interpretation of the black flame;

The flame dances before me
Casting shadows across my world.
It ignites from deep within,
And is born beyond bliss.
I can see truth now,
It emanates from my eyes.
And as such I can see deception,
The whirlwind that is all around.
But, I fear it not,
I am no longer in its darkness,
No longer drowning in that naïve abyss,
This flame has destroyed such lies.
I do not stand within the light,
For now it burns within me.
A raging passion that drives me forward,
And the peace of intuition.

flame 2

Thank you again, for stopping by, and as always please feel free to comment or message if you have any questions. I’d love any feedback!


So, now a bit about me…

Lilith – John Collier (1887)

Hello again,

Now that you know some of the basics of Satanism / Luciferianism (from here on out I will group them together as LHP unless a distinction is necessary) I can tell you a bit about myself and my personal beliefs.


I suppose one of the first thing I should mention is that I am not a member of any order, church, temple, or organization. I have never been initiated or baptized into any belief system or religion, and I fully intend to keep it that way. Everything I state or believe is personal to me, I do not claim to speak for anyone other than myself. Order’s, churches, and temples can be wonderful things at certain times, but in general I feel that dogmatically organized religion leads to stagnation.

(Unfortunately, this is a necessary note:)

To any of you who have heard or read silly rumors about the “ILLUMINATI” or the dreaded “New World Order”; I’m sorry to disappoint you, but that whole idea is absolutely hilarious, not just to myself but to every follower of the LHP I’ve ever met or spoken to. (Seriously, not to be mean to anyone that has been sucked into that, but it has lead to a lot of jokes).


Anyway here goes:


I define myself as a Theistic Luciferian. I believe that there is a “deity” (or possibly just a current of energy), which humans throughout history have referred to as Satan, Lucifer, Set, Prometheus, etc… basically I believe that this deity or energy is able to help lead the human mind to knowledge, strength and complete empowerment.

I consciously chose to use the term Luciferian rather than Satanist to try and avoid some of the cognitive “gut reactions” that the word satanist causes. I believe that as far as Christianity is concerned, they used both names for the same entity. Lucifer was one of god’s favored angels, but once he “fell” he was called Satan, which just means adversary. The way I see it, the name Satan was used as an insult, similar to referring to him as an “asshole”.

Actually this brings a basic theology question to mind, I’d like you to consider if you’re willing:

If god creates each angel with a purpose (Michael, the warrior, Lucifer the light bringer, etc…) then how would Lucifer have “rebelled” in a negative sense?

My belief is that if Lucifer was created to shed light and knowledge, then it stands to reason that such desires drive his every action. The only logical reason he would “rebel”, especially against his beloved creator, is if God’s intentions for man were different than his (which I personally believe is represented by the story of Adam and Eve).

I don’t expect to change anyone’s mind, I just think it’s a perspective that doesn’t often get considered.

Anyway, as I was saying, I never refer to Lucifer as Satan in my work, I personally believe it would disrespectful. Wanting to be respectful does not mean that I worship anyone. I do not, and have never “worshiped” Lucifer, or “sold” my soul.

Seems like a pretty silly concept to me =)

I believe that we as humans are created with with same potential as any “deity” that we’ve come to recognize. I’m certainly not going to sell off my potential to anyone, it doesn’t matter whether his name is God or Lucifer.

I serve no one but myself, but I have a respect for the knowledge that the LHP has lead me to. I respect Lucifer (Set, Promethius, etc…) for what he represents and what he has helped me manifest in my life.

Thoth Tarot – Trump XIV, Art. Aleister Crowley (Symbol of the concept of balance, alchemy, and essentially creation)

Thank you again for stopping by, I hope you found something of interest. Please comment or message me with any questions or concerns. All feedback would be much appreciated!